UPDATE - BING! BING!

While leaving an observation at a middle school in the Bronx today I walked though a parkinglot for the first time in months. It was small but the experience was largely affecting. I felt so much larger than all the cars corraled within thin yellow lines boxing the asphalt. The openness of the space, the sky, the emptiness it all contained. It was a transgression from the sidewalks I've been confined to, the asphalt I hurry to cross, the commotion of metal, fiberglass, and bodies in motion. The other pedestrians around me were all traversing the grid of sidewalks as I wove through the broad driveway of the lot, ambivalent to this strange and familiar landscape.

I'm discovering how non-linear uber-urban life can be. Sometimes I feel like I'm being tossed from one event to another - no connection, relationship nil save that I happen to be in them. It's like I keep walking through rooms where entirely different things are happening and I remain for a while in each one, playing a certain role, then without reason I open the door and step into a completely different universe. I feel like I've lost track of time - or am discovering a new living definition of it. Wasn't there some crazy sci-fi tv show about this? Quantum Leap or something? How disorienting! ...but it can also be exciting. You never know what's going to happen next but surely, because of the pace of life out here, something will happen.

I've started teaching environmental classes for the Center for the Urban Environment (CUE). After a couple weeks of training and observing I finally taught my first two classes today. It was great. There's something so rewarding and gratifying about teaching - but perhaps only because I know it's not my end. Not sure if I could ever "be" a teacher (in the career sense). Yet I feel like I'm a natural teacher, it's an innate skill I can deploy intuitively. I was slightly worried because I wasn't too familiar with the curriculum I was assigned to deliver, but once I got into the classroom it all came out so concisely, flowed and adapted. It was organic. And maybe that's where the gratification comes from - using skills that come so natural to oneself - as if we were born to perform certain actions in at a certain moments in time. It is a service. To serve others and enjoy it simply for what it is.

I look forward to the evolution of this city sojourn as it transforms and influences me ever so delicately that I may not even notice the alterations and adaptations until I am here no more. A year is just fragments of time that pass in warm or cold weather. New York is a bottomless pit and I'm forever falling through its rings of darkness and electric light.

PHOTOS TO COME SOON!

A CITY OF FISTS

A CITY OF FISTS


bequeathed with a gift
into unborn hands that clenched and wished
sung from gold lips
welcome, child, to the city of fists
nursed from milk and honey tits
history, I'm told, has lead us to this
illustrious arches that span for the sky
a boy with a dream and a book full of lies

IT'S ALL FOR YOU
WROUGHT FROM THE SWEAT BLOOD AND TEARS
OF BRANCHES AND YEARS
STORIES OF FEAR
BUT ALAS, WITH FISTS WE HAVE MADE IT HERE

now relax my dear, it's safe and secure
the beasts have been slain
the savages tamed
the landscape manicured

EXALT THE EMPIRE
ENJOY THE WEALTH
EVERYTHING TO SATISFY THIS GLOBALIZED TASTE
PROGRESS HAS BROUGHT US PLENTY
DIP YOUR FINGERS
CREATE
CONSUME
DREAM DREAM DREAM THE LARGEST DREAMS IN YOUR HEART
AND LET EMPIRE BUILD THEM HASTY TO START

dreams bought and sold and the same stories are told

REVEL IN THIS
AND FIGHT NOT WITH YOUR HEART
BUT WITH YOUR FISTS
TO DREAM, TO LOVE, TO CREATE, TO LIVE

this gilded life
i've carried so dear
clasped in my mind
the story procured
a man on the moon
a future of fear
and all these desires that make and do
forge thoughts into cities and seeds into fields


I never thought it would come to this
unclenched fists

RED HANDS IN BEDLAM
WITHIN A PYRITE WASTELAND
THE STORY I NEVER KNEW

all these wishes now made
and these dreams now sung
have drown the world in a ten thousand year flood
every object made drops as a tear from our mind
into this torrent of excess and pride
submerged in this myth
at the bottom of the sea
a steadfast nation
with fists for trophies

SWIM AGAINST

with hands that pull and part
to navigate through this saturate art
be small
slide around and in between
make little of the world
live simply
watch and breathe

Valentines Day with Mother Gem (Leslie Hall)

I spent Valentines day with Karina (my valentina). We had a raw/vegan dinner at Quintessence in the East Village and afterwards went to some cabaret before ending up at the Leslie & the Lys show in the Lower East Side. It was a SOLD OUT show and we didn't have tickets... I was supposed to buy them online but procrastinated. Anyhow, we waited outside for half-an-hour and finally got in. The show was amazing. Leslie gives an energetic and fun performance. The keeper of thy gems...

















Video of Leslie taken with my phone:



A YouTube video of how the show starts (this is from a show in Cleveland). Check out her high kicks! She's amazing!

Bwahahahaaha..... Hillarious.

FASHION WEEK - DAY 5: The Show

G-Star Raw - Fall 2008 New York

FASHION WEEK - DAY 4: this show is gonna rock

I watched the rehearsal several times today. It was hard to pull myself away because it just looks so amazing. The show is visually stunning, sharp choreography, and the models really know how to work the runway. The way they walk - wow! It inspires me to just walk with more life in each step - and they make walking look fun, because it can be. I'm pumped for the show tomorrow. Karina lent me her camera so I can take some better quality pics and video. Here are some pics from today and a short video clip:

The VIP press room with G-Star furniture.
The stage and runway
Rehearsal

FASHION WEEK - DAY 3: go towards the bright lights

Today was nice. I didn't go to Gotham Hall until 11am, so I ended up with a good night of sleep. The set and risers are mostly finished. I think they were about to test the lights and sound when I left at 6pm to go to the airport to pick up the models - which is probably all that I'll write about in this post because I need to keep it short.

A private car picked me up at Gotham and took me to JFK airport to pick up the models, their choreographer and model matron. Because the superbowl was starting traffic was moving pretty well. I got to the terminal and had to make change to finish stuffing envelopes with per diem money for each model so they can buy meals for the times they're not at Gotham to have the catered food. Stuffing 34 envelopes and sealing them (BTW, I didn't lick them, I used gaffers tape) takes a while, but it was just enough time for them to get through customs. I know I'm doing a lousy job telling this so I'm just going to cut it shorter.

Rounded up models in terminal. They all wanted to go outside and smoke. We got on the bus, they got their envelopes and we went to the Dylan Hotel in Manhattan where they checked in - only had one check-in issue which was quickly resolved. Blah blah.

The models are nice. They're pretty and young. They've got a lot of energy and behave just like young 20 year olds excited to be in New York City. It'll be interesting to see their professional side at work in Gotham Hall because tonight they just seemed like good looking young people.

As I left the hotel to walk to the subway station at Bryant Park, a group of the male models were on the corner and asked me where they could find a place to eat because, as they noticed, everything east of Bryant Park around their hotel was closed. I told them to go to Times Square but they didn't know which way it was so I told them to follow me because I was going in that direction. One model struck up a conversation with me about how he wanted to move to New York to pursue modeling and how he really liked it here. When I got to the park I told them, "from here you just need to go towards the bright lights" and pointed down 42nd street to the beacon of electric luster emanating from the hollow heart of the city, caged in by towering walls of concrete and steel. Walking down the stairs into the subway station I thought about how poignant it was to say that to models - go towards the bright lights - because they do: flashes and spotlights and set lights, key lights and fill lights. And they're going towards Times Square, the corporate media spotlight/tourist trap of the city. I could picture their bigs eyes and wild smiles as they trotted off in excitement and in a way I pitied them for their innocence while at the same time knowing that Times Square is exactly what they're looking for and that to direct them anywhere else would only lead to dissatisfaction, disappointment, and disarray.

When I got off the train in Brooklyn I was surprised to see more people out and about than I had seen in Manhattan. At 10pm on a Sunday men walking dogs, friends chatting on stoops, couples crossing the street, groups of young people laughing as they strolled jocosely under the bare canopy of the sidewalk. It was the superbowl that I had missed, New York had won the game. I smiled and was happy to be amongst Brooklyn, to see a different kind of light burning brightly on a cold and dark winter night, one that carried on beyond the screen and filled the dim-lit streets with a radiant energy.

FASHION WEEK - DAY 2: Steppin' up

Yesterday's blog entry was a little whiny - mostly motivated by that nasty little cold, which is on it's way out, or so it felt like it today. I'm actually pretty happy to working after a month of being unemployed and going to job interviews, etc. And even if I am working long hours, it's not the most strenuous or difficult work and the time somehow goes by pretty quickly.

Today my colleague (the guy who got me the job) asked me if I had experience in the food and hospitality industry because I really seemed to know how to work with the caterers and manage the dining area in Gotham Hall where all the crew and staff eat various meals throughout the day (which is one of my main duties). I didn't even make the connection until he said that, but I suppose all that time working at Marc's European Grill is lending itself to micro-management elsewhere, whether I'm conscious of it or not. After admitting my repertoire I was like, okay, I have done something like this before - and I whipped that little production dining room into shape. People took notice. Things went smoother after that.

Photos of the day:

This is the production office room / dressing room / sewing room / fittings, etc.
You can see the G-Star line on all the racks (each model has a rack). There's a security guard stationed in this room just to protect the garments.

I had to walk to the Dylan Hotel (E 41st between Madison and Park) to confirm the check-in process for the models, who I'll be transporting from the airport to the hotel tomorrow night. On my way I passed by Bryant Park, where the official fashion shows are held in the notorious white tents. Here's of shot of the tents with crazy skyscrapers in the background.


Finally, to promote biking as an alternative form of transportation, Donna Karan/ DKNY partnered with the New York City Dept. of Transportation to place bright neon orange bicycles throughout the city. This one was along 42nd Street near Bryant Park. They're chained down, but they're bright as hell. I wouldn't be surprised if they literally glow in the dark. But why does Donna Karan care about alternative forms of transportation? especially biking, which is so not fashionable.
High fashion carbon credits? Green washing? non-fashion transportation statement?
BTW, I love that there's a hummer, an SUV, and a pick-up on the street behind the bike!

FASHION WEEK - DAY 1: Rain all over my parade

I worked a twelve hour day today. It rained for 10 of those 12 hours and for some of that time I was out in the rain, dropping off nextel phones, picking up packages, and unloading G-Star clothes and furniture (yes, they shipped their own furniture to furnish the VIP rooms because they didn't like what was in there). I'm striving to get over a nasty cold that declared war on my body at the worst possible time. Basically, today was my intro day and it would have been fine if I'd felt fine, but it was miserable. Okay. That might be an exaggeration. I drank a lot of hot tea, and ate three catered meals that were decent. The work I'm doing is a step up from what a PA (production assistant) would do on a movie set - yeah, they're pretty much the gophers (is that the right term?), running around doing all the little tasks that pop up unexpectedly. My duties are a little more set and they'll become more so as the week goes on. So, again, I guess I'm exaggerating. There are 3 PAs on site and I'm not one of them. But I lend a hand where I can because at certain points in the day there's some down time. Anyways, I need to sleep so I can do the whole 12 hour day again tomorrow. Below are some photos of setting up in Gotham Hall - where the show will take place, and one photo of what I saw when I looked up upon exiting the building tonight.

LIVE TO BLEED

THIS HEART BLEEDS AT 7000 kilobits per second
THROUGH DEEP BLUE EYES AND HIGH SPEED LINES
AND MILES AND MILES OF MAKE-BELIEVE LIES
IN PICTURES OF MEN AND IN HEADLINE NEWS
I'M STARTING FIRES THAT BURN PAPERTHIN TRUTHS
WHILE THIS Papier-mâché MACHINE
PUMPS CORONARY DREAMS THAT BLAZE
AS THE LUNGS OF DOVES WHEN THEY SING
here is deciet
i made it in you
run away with my love
and make it untrue
ONLY ALL IS ON SCREEN THAT WILL EVER BEEN SEEN
AND BEYOND THIS REPLICATE LIGHT
AND MOONLESS COLD NIGHTS
AND WORDS THAT CRY OUT TO EYES UNABLE TO BEHOLD
ANYTHING OTHER THAN PAPER FOOLS GOLD

shut this lid and quit this lie
the world is on fire and it's all in your mind
but don't think it's not real
because this blood you can feel
fermenting red and blue
inside a corporal contract
to suffer happenstance
that to fight or deny
would make one feel as though they would die

BETWEEN THE BRANCHES OF THE WORLD THE SKY STILL SPINS
FALSE DREAMS OF GOLD WINGS THAT WERE NEVER BORN TO FLY
AND THE BIRDS STILL SING FROM FROZEN BOUGHS BROKEN
AS BONES ON UNFORGIVING GROUND

live to learn to let bleed the wounds that set free
our hearts from our minds and our eyes from the screen
there's a fire inside and it's out of control
let burn
let be
and live to bleed

Strategic Covert Human Operations

For the past few days my stomach hasn't been too happy. The possible suspects: bad lox, rancid seasoning, a gastronomical disagreement, or stress. Narrowing it down is futile. As an unfortunate result though, and because there are always so many people around in public, I've had to devise strategic methods to relieve/release the fermented gasiness in stealth. I will share this valuable knowledge I have gathered from, well, personal experience.

If on the sidewalk, walk closer to the street and wait for large trucks/cars to pass, then you pass.

In subway station: release as a train (that is not yours) passes - or, this is tricky, if it is your train, release as it is pulling into the station (to mask sound) then quickly walk away from area towards the doors of a car further down the station and board as though nothing is unusual - because if something appears unusual, someone might see something and then say something. Do it right and no one will ever know.

I suspect you could also find alleys, alcoves, open space if you're lucky to be near a park. There's room for creativity, which is a good thing. Perhaps I'll update with more strategies, though I really hope this gastro-disaster passes before I have the opportunity to do that.

Hello, you're laughing a little but also a little grossed out. It's okay. It'll pass.

One Storm

On April 19, 2003 I wrote the following in my journal:

"A revolution is taking place in the hearts and minds of Americans. I'm not certain how long it has been brewing but I think for the most part it is fairly recent. It's like a rumbling in the distance as a violent storm approaches. People from all walks of life are waking up and sharing their experiences with others...Our freedom is being stripped right in front of our faces and people are starting to see the truth. Each side is building their army, preparing for the inevitable. Our history has been defined by a series of revolts of the oppressed against the oppressors...and will cyclically continue until there is no people ruling over other people...Many will die, man may even destroy himself in the process, but one thing is sure, as storm is approaching."

Today when I meditate most deeply on the present moment I feel that same violent storm only now it is not so distant. Now I can see it on the horizon. I feel it's momentous electricity everywhere about me, rousing every atom in my being. And everything I read and see and sense only confirms this vision.

We are on the verge of massive change. Revolution is not only evident but desperately necessary. To say otherwise is to suspend reason in the face of a surplus of evidence. What is happening is beyond our reign of control. This is nature. And if you allow yourself to be aligned with nature you will become this revolution to rid the world of the oppressive agents that have subjugated life on this planet for far too long. We are one life on this planet and you are either for it or against it.

We are One. We are not seperate from nature, we are nature and the same forces governing the weather are woven through every man, woman, and child, through the grass and trees, the food that we eat, the water we drink.

This makes sense in connection with the devastating and dramatic events we are attributing to "climate change". The planet is getting hotter because the planet is angry (sounds like something you'd hear a shaman of native american tribe say to explain global warming). But it is true. Nature is very upset and is preparing to fight back. If life doesn't fight back it will cease to exist with the way things are going.

This electricity, this anger, all this pandemonium that we can see and feel in the world today - is the storm. It should not be feared no more than a summer thunderstorm. It is a force of nature. It is necessary for the renewal of life on this planet just as a rainstorm is necessary for renewal of vegetation after a drought.

Listen. Open your heart and mind to nature and join the revolution for Life. What each of us must do will become clear once we have made our allegiance and renounced our greed.

The Music that Colors my Life

I've added a sidebar with links to the right side of my blog (under Hillary). The links lead to the Myspace pages of artists that I've discovered recently and would like to share. I'll add more as I find them/they find me. Hope you enjoy. If you like them look them up on the HypeMachine to find more songs and MP3s for your continued listening pleasure.

mucho love,

joe

Empire State Building between Brooklyn smoke stacks

Taken with phone camera so terrible quality... but this is the view from Fort Greene park looking towards Manhattan. I like to walk to this one spot where when I look at the ESB it is between the smoke stacks. I don't know why I like to see it framed like that. It's almost as if the ESB represents a certain achievement in architecture and economic class... and then there's the smoke stacks which, to me at least, are working class, ugly architecture (though I can appreciate their presence), polluting, etc. I like seeing these two world come together and to see the smoke stacks eclipse the ESB in perceived hight and also on either side of it.

Maybe I can get a better photo when I have a job and money to buy a nice camera. Until then, this is what I'm sharing. I took this today in 20 degree weather. My face went numb. But I love going to the park. It's the best thing within a 5 minute walk - even on a frigid winter day. To see that and be amongst old and tall trees in an austere stillness is worth a numb face, fingers and toes.

America Sold Out

From the article
Foreigners Buy Stakes in the U.S. at a Record Pace

“The forces sucking in this capital are much bigger than the political forces,” said Mr. Garten, the Yale trade expert. “If there is a big controversy, it will be between Washington on the one hand and corporate America on the other. In that contest, the financiers and the businessmen are going to win, as they always do.”

What a statement! The businessmen will win, as they always do! And in contest to government! It's so true but crazy to read it this blatantly and of all places the New York Times. The people with the money are the ones calling the shots - not politicians (who act as the public face that says "I support people" but instead cater to money).

Also worthy of bringing to attention is the fact that the more removed the ownership from the assets (people/property/quality) the less concern there is for what actually happens at the local level. In other words, foreign investors only care about the money coming out of their investment (after all, it was money that brought them here to begin with) because that's all they ever really see from their corporate office abroad. They don't care if the people are healthy and safe, if the environment is preserved, or how their business affects the local economy and livelihood. All that matters is that it keeps making them a profit, and they'll cut corners where they have to so they can increase their profits and attract investors to their stock.

I think this is bad news for Americans. Businesses are selling out to save themselves in a short-sighted attempt at a quick fix for an economy now in recession.