this is me ^
now: 4:48AM Saturday
sick and unable to sleep because of the medication I'm taking.
I feel like I haven't been this sick from a cold since I was a kid.
I work with kids everyday. now I'm sick like one.
my hair looks so wild in that photo... and I'm afraid to lose it, to go bald and patchy
but it's destined to happen. it's in my genes... and it's already starting.
Physically, I'm not growing up anymore. Now it's time to be an adult homo sapien.
Perhaps I'm at that age when most people start to grasp desperately at their youth
trying to maintain the appearance, hold on to that feeling before they start to grow old.
I think of my parents and how at my age they were already married and starting a family;
careers and a house; dogs. Yet in some ways I still feel young. Not ready for marriage or a mortgage now.
I'm considering going back to school in a very serious way. I want to start non-profit organizations and sustainable businesses. I don't have the skills to do that right now.
I need training. Need to go to school to learn how. So I can do what what I really want
to do with my time. Right now, I just feel like I've hit a ceiling in the non-profit world
and I'm not going to get any farther than this unless I learn more.
oh wow, this reads so bland.... but.... this is now.
1 comment:
Your hair looks cool! Too bad about the cold though.
Getting old sucks! we're destined to slowly decay under the ever wearing pressure of time. Relentless, unstoppable, hostile, uncaring and impersonal... we are held subject. Everything dear to us is stripped away but is anything gained? I like to think so. For those who able to keep an open, objective viewpoint & learn from the past & apply their experience. For those who can learn to let go, accept loss and embrace change. Maybe time holds treasures for you?
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